In conversation with Poonam Thanki

1 . Introduce yourself

Hi, my name is Poonam, and I have a three-year-old daughter. I work in the costume department for films and TV shows, as well as having my own podcast, about the people that work behind the scenes in film, TV and theatre.

2. What is your job title?

Costume Props and Jewellery Maker.

3. Who looks after the kids when you are working?

A mixture of Grandparents and Nursery.

4.  How long did you take off work after having your baby?

I planned on having a year off, but in the end, with the strikes and waiting for a job to start it was 20 months. Which although not planned and stressful in moments, I am extremely grateful for.

5.  Would you say that you have a good work/life balance?

I would say there are times when I feel like I have a balance and other times not, you can feel like you’re being pulled in many different directions. But generally yes, I have a very supportive husband, family and work family, which makes all the difference.

6.     Are you job-sharing or working flexibly?

I work 4 days a week and work flexibly to some extent. I have an incredibly understanding boss and colleagues who are great. They understand that life with kids can’t always be planned!

7.     What do you think is the hardest part of being a working/industry parent?

A big one, I think, is the guilt, although I’m sure this is not unique to our industry!

I also feel there can often be an ‘all or nothing’ mentality to work, which is maybe why mothers/parents end up leaving. I love what I do, and the people that I work with, and they understand the curveballs of parenthood. However, this is not always the case. I know things are changing, but to retain talented people, changing our mindsets about what a working day looks like, such as flexible working, would be a great start. Creating an environment where people thrive can only make their output better.

8. What are your tips for any other women out there wanting to have kids and keep a career in film?

Do it! I know this sounds simple, but it can feel like there’s always a reason to put it off. Speak to other parents in your department and beyond to see how they manage with work and kids. Is it possible to job share, can you do compressed hours, or do some work from home? I found that this allayed a lot of my fears and made me feel like it can work. This also made me think more about the different ways of working. Just because it hasn’t been done before in your department doesn’t mean it can’t be done!

9.     Any advice for anyone about to return to work after maternity?

There’s a high chance you’ll feel guilty, but don’t let this feeling rule you! For me, having a great support system is key. My husband is very hands-on, and we discussed before I returned to work what our responsibilities (with flexibility) would be and how we would manage around both our jobs, which made it easier to focus on work when I was there and home when home. My boss was great, and we had conversations about what my return to work would involve, which again really helped! Be easy on yourself, it’ll be hard, but you’ll get into a groove. Advice I found great for general parenting is do the thing that works for you and your child.

10.  What advice did you wish someone had given you?

Stay present, it’s so easy to focus on the to-do lists and tomorrow, but try and embrace the now!