In conversation with Theresa Ryan-van Graan

1. Introduce yourself

I’m Theresa Ryan - van Graan and I'm a film producer based in South Africa. I have two boys aged 11 and 8. I started out as a freelance production manager and then took an in-house position as Head of Production at Moonlighting Films, South Africa’s foremost production facilitation company. It was during this time that I had both my children. After burning out  trying to be a mother and a producer, I then took a sabbatical for 4 years, whilst the children were little,  I recently came back to co produce on the critically acclaimed independent film, MOFFIE by Oliver Hermanus and have now joined Oliver in starting our own production company, Penzance Films. 

2. What is your job title? 

Film Producer 

3. Who looks after the kids when you're working? 

When I am in production I have an au pair that stays with my kids and looks after them.

4. How long did you take off after having your baby? 

6 months with the first and 3 months with the 2nd

5. Would you say you have a good work/life balance? 

That’s hard because when I'm in the throws of either, I often miss the other but I do feel that the balance is getting better as my boys are growing older. My husband is a transport and logistics manager in the film industry so he is also often traveling or away on location, which makes family life and raising kids even more interesting. It’s not often that we are all together as a family so when we are we make the most of it and it’s precious time.  COVID has ironically brought about the longest that the 4 of us have spent together in many years and we are lapping it up as we are not sure when next we will have such a great opportunity to all be in the same house for this amount of time.

6. Are you job sharing or working flexibly?

Or would you consider it as an option? Currently I am working flexibly but when in production Im fully committed to the job and I only see my kids on off days, which is really hard.

7. What do you think is the hardest part of being a female working in media/film/tv industry and being a parent? 

Dealing with the guilt of trying to be both the best mother and do the best job. It’s a constant see- saw of emotions and there’s always a low level anxiety.The prime example for me is when I travel for work and I  see a mother on a trip with her children, I become jealous and miss my kids terribly but whilst on sabbatical taking a family trip to see my husband on location with the kids I would feel so envious of corporate women, on their phones and laptops travelling for work. Tough to find a win!

8. What are your tips for any other women out there wanting to have kids and keep a career in film? 

I would say the most important thing is making sure that you have a really good support system in place in order to maintain a semblance of balance in both.The film industry is a fantastic and rewarding choice when you are single and young but when the idea of children gets thrown in the mix, it becomes a little more challenging to keep up with the pace of this challenging industry.  It is possible but it’s not for the feint hearted, you need to be prepared to make sacrifices in both work and parenting. There is a reason that not many woman producers have children, it is really tough keeping up on all fronts.

9.     Any advice for anyone about to return to work after maternity?

 Take it slowly, integrate yourself. Even if you don’t suffer from post part depression, it is still a mind field of emotions as you navigate your way back.

10.  What advice did you wish someone had given you? 

You CAN have it all but often not at the same time. Be prepared for some hard decisions and compromises. The rewards do come later on as now although my kids miss me when Im working they are starting to appreciate having a working mother that they are proud of, especially my eldest son.This in turn helps with my internal guilt of being away from them for long periods of time.